Random absurdity at Burning Man

wordplay by orange peel moses

(reprinted with permission from Image Magazine(

From the sky, it looks like a ginormous horseshoe. From Center Camp Café, it reminds me of the bar in Star Wars. From the trash fence on the outer perimeter, it looks like the place where they shot the Martian landing in Mars Attacks! or parts of Dr. Dre’s “California Love” video!

What do you get when you take the world’s second largest flat expanse of land--a prehistoric lake bed called Black Rock Desert--and fill it with nearly 40,000 of the world’s most creative individuals (and quite possibly representatives from other worlds as well)? A week long experiment in temporary community called Burning Man.

One common misconception about Burning Man is that it’s just a Rainbow Gathering in the desert. Now, I’ve never been to a Rainbow Gathering, but I think it’s fairly safe to assume Burning Man doesn’t much resemble one...unless they have giant flame-throwing robots and wireless internet access as well.

Almost everything that happens in a normal permanent city also happens in Black Rock City (christened after the desert). People do yoga, people get coffee, people roller-skate, people ride their bicycles, people engage in manual labor, people jump on trampolines, people shower, people research stories for the newspaper, people have sex, people build huge flammable art installations and people dance to house music all day long. Of course, there are some minor differences. Underground plumbing’s kinda out of the question, but public nudity and aboveground bonfires aren’t.

Last year, Denver’s very own Friends in Stereo fam-damily ventured to the vast void-like canvas and back, returning with more stories than you can “shake a stick at.” Examples, you ask? Ever seen a midget in a Condoleeza Rice mask do a striptease with an American flag? I have. Ever eaten ice cream made with a fire extinguisher? I have. Ever taken a two day jaunt in a time machine? Check. What about a robot giraffe with disco ball balls? Been there, done that. Ever seen two half-naked girls teeter back and forth on a penis-shaped teeter totter? Old news. What about a man in a flame retardant suit conducting potentially lethal bolts of Tesla coil voltage on top of a bus? Doctor Megavolt is so six years ago. Danced in the shadow of a two story high Venus Flytrap? Last year was a first. Ever seen an Asian girl dance with a levitating light rod? Me neither, until last year. Heard a puppet beatbox while French maids dusted you off with feather dusters and spoon-fed you dollops of chocolate and tablespoons full of tequila?

Of all the absurdist art and mad randomness, though, Bassnectar, a DJ/producer/soul brother from Burning Man’s San Francisco birthplace, remains an undisputable highlight year after year after year. Bassnectar’s epic, marathon Sunday morning sunrise set at Lotus was one for the record books, thanks to Mutaytor’s SuzeQ and everyone else that shared that phenomenally breathtaking New Year’s Day with me...even if, by Greco-Roman calendar standards, it was technically the day before Labor Day. Black rock on.